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| Honoré de Balzac Another study of woman IntraText CT - Text |
IV
"This, of course, applies only to passion; in any other sense it would
be socially wrong. Nothing more clearly proves the necessity for
indissoluble marriage than the instability of passion. The two sexes
must be chained up, like wild beasts as they are, by inevitable law,
deaf and mute. Eliminate revenge, and infidelity in love is nothing.
Those who believe that for them there is but one woman in the world
must be in favor of vengeance, and then there is but one form of it--
that of Othello.
"Mine was different."
The words produced in each of us the imperceptible movement which
newspaper writers represent in Parliamentary reports by the words:
/great sensation/.
"Cured of my cold, and of my pure, absolute, divine love, I flung
myself into an adventure, of which the heroine was charming, and of a
style of beauty utterly opposed to that of my deceiving angel. I took
care not to quarrel with this clever woman, who was so good an
actress, for I doubt whether true love can give such gracious delights
as those lavished by such a dexterous fraud. Such refined hypocrisy is
as good as virtue.--I am not speaking to you Englishwomen, my lady,"
said the Minister, suavely, addressing Lady Barimore, Lord Dudley's
daughter. "I tried to be the same lover.
"I wished to have some of my hair worked up for my new angel, and I
went to a skilled artist who at that time dwelt in the Rue Boucher.
The man had a monopoly of capillary keepsakes, and I mention his
address for the benefit of those who have not much hair; he has plenty
of every kind and every color. After I had explained my order, he
showed me his work. I then saw achievements of patience surpassing
those which the story books ascribe to fairies, or which are executed
by prisoners. He brought me up to date as to the caprices and fashions
governing the use of hair. 'For the last year,' said he, 'there has
been a rage for marking linen with hair; happily I had a fine
collection of hair and skilled needlewomen,'--on hearing this a
suspicion flashed upon me; I took out my handkerchief and said, 'So
this was done in your shop, with false hair?'--He looked at the
handkerchief, and said, 'Ay! that lady was very particular, she
insisted on verifying the tint of the hair. My wife herself marked
those handkerchiefs. You have there, sir, one of the finest pieces of
work we have ever executed.' Before this last ray of light I might
have believed something--might have taken a woman's word. I left the
shop still having faith in pleasure, but where love was concerned I
was as atheistical as a mathematician.
"Two months later I was sitting by the side of the ethereal being in
her boudoir, on her sofa; I was holding one of her hands--they were
very beautiful--and we scaled the Alps of sentiment, culling their
sweetest flowers, and pulling off the daisy-petals; there is always a
moment when one pulls daisies to pieces, even if it is in a drawing-
room and there are no daisies. At the intensest moment of tenderness,
and when we are most in love, love is so well aware of its own short
duration that we are irresistibly urged to ask, 'Do you love me? Will
you love me always?' I seized the elegiac moment, so warm, so flowery,
so full-blown, to lead her to tell her most delightful lies, in the
enchanting language of love. Charlotte displayed her choicest
allurements: She could not live without me; I was to her the only man
in the world; she feared to weary me, because my presence bereft her
of all her wits; with me, all her faculties were lost in love; she was
indeed too tender to escape alarms; for the last six months she had
been seeking some way to bind me to her eternally, and God alone knew
that secret; in short, I was her god!"
The women who heard de Marsay seemed offended by seeing themselves so
well acted, for he seconded the words by airs, and sidelong attitudes,
and mincing grimaces which were quite illusory.
"At the very moment when I might have believed these adorable
falsehoods, as I still held her right hand in mine, I said to her,
'When are you to marry the Duke?'
"The thrust was so direct, my gaze met hers so boldly, and her hand
lay so tightly in mine, that her start, slight as it was, could not be
disguised; her eyes fell before mine, and a faint blush colored her
cheeks.--'The Duke! What do you mean?' she said, affecting great
astonishment.--'I know everything,' replied I; 'and in my opinion, you
should delay no longer; he is rich; he is a duke; but he is more than
devout, he is religious! I am sure, therefore, that you have been
faithful to me, thanks to his scruples. You cannot imagine how
urgently necessary it is that you should compromise him with himself
and with God; short of that you will never bring him to the point.'--
'Is this a dream?' said she, pushing her hair from her forehead,
fifteen years before Malibran, with the gesture which Malibran has
made so famous.--'Come, do not be childish, my angel,' said I, trying
to take her hands; but she folded them before her with a little
prudish and indignant mein.--'Marry him, you have my permission,' said
I, replying to this gesture by using the formal /vous/ instead of
/tu/. 'Nay, better, I beg you to do so.'--'But,' cried she, falling at
my knees, 'there is some horrible mistake; I love no one in the world
but you; you may demand any proofs you please.'--'Rise, my dear,' said
I, 'and do me the honor of being truthful.'--'As before God.'--'Do you
doubt my love?'--'No.'--'Nor my fidelity?'--'No.'--'Well, I have
committed the greatest crime,' I went on. 'I have doubted your love
and your fidelity. Between two intoxications I looked calmly about
me.'--'Calmly!' sighed she. 'That is enough, Henri; you no longer love
me.'
"She had at once found, you perceive, a loophole for escape. In scenes
like these an adverb is dangerous. But, happily, curiosity made her
add: 'And what did you see? Have I ever spoken of the Duke excepting
in public? Have you detected in my eyes----?'--'No,' said I, 'but in
his. And you have eight times made me go to Saint-Thomas d'Aquin to
see you listening to the same mass as he.'--'Ah!' she exclaimed, 'then
I have made you jealous!'--Oh! I only wish I could be!' said I,
admiring the pliancy of her quick intelligence, and these acrobatic
feats which can only be successful in the eyes of the blind. 'But by
dint of going to church I have become very incredulous. On the day of
my first cold, and your first treachery, when you thought I was in
bed, you received the Duke, and you told me you had seen no one.'--'Do
you know that your conduct is infamous?'--'In what respect? I consider
your marriage to the Duke an excellent arrangement; he gives you a
great name, the only rank that suits you, a brilliant and
distinguished position. You will be one of the queens of Paris. I
should be doing you a wrong if I placed any obstacle in the way of
this prospect, this distinguished life, this splendid alliance. Ah!
Charlotte, some day you will do me justice by discovering how unlike
my character is to that of other young men. You would have been
compelled to deceive me; yes, you would have found it very difficult
to break with me, for he watches you. It is time that we should part,
for the Duke is rigidly virtuous. You must turn prude; I advise you to
do so. The Duke is vain; he will be proud of his wife.'--'Oh!' cried
she, bursting into tears, 'Henri, if only you had spoken! Yes, if you
had chosen'--it was I who was to blame, you understand--'we would have
gone to live all our days in a corner, married, happy, and defied the
world.'--'Well, it is too late now,' said I, kissing her hands, and
putting on a victimized air.--'Good God! But I can undo it all!' said
she.--'No, you have gone too far with the Duke. I ought indeed to go a
journey to part us more effectually. We should both have reason to
fear our own affection----'--'Henri, do you think the Duke has any
suspicions?' I was still 'Henri,' but the /tu/ was lost for ever.--'I
do not think so,' I replied, assuming the manner of a friend; 'but be
as devout as possible, reconcile yourself to God, for the Duke waits
for proofs; he hesitates, you must bring him to the point.'