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CHAPTER
V
THE
MACHINE IN MOTION
At this moment the division of
Monsieur de la Billardiere was in a
state of unusual excitement,
resulting very naturally from the event
which was about to happen; for heads
of divisions do not die every
day, and there is no insurance
office where the chances of life and
death are calculated with more
sagacity than in a government bureau.
Self-interest stifles all
compassion, as it does in children, but the
government service adds hypocrisy to
boot.
The clerks of the bureau Baudoyer
arrived at eight o'clock in the
morning, whereas those of the bureau
Rabourdin seldom appeared till
nine,--a circumstance which did not
prevent the work in the latter
office from being more rapidly
dispatched than that of the former.
Dutocq had important reasons for
coming early on this particular
morning. The previous evening he had
furtively entered the study where
Sebastien was at work, and had seen
him copying some papers for
Rabourdin; he concealed himself
until he saw Sebastien leave the
premises without taking any papers
away with him. Certain, therefore,
of finding the rather voluminous
memorandum which he had seen,
together with its copy, in some
corner of the study, he searched
through the boxes one after another
until he finally came upon the
fatal list. He carried it in hot
haste to an autograph-printing house,
where he obtained two pressed copies
of the memorandum, showing, of
course, Rabourdin's own writing.
Anxious not to arouse suspicion, he
had gone very early to the office
and replaced both the memorandum and
Sebastien's copy in the box from
which he had taken them. Sebastien,
who was kept up till after midnight
at Madame Rabourdin's party, was,
in spite of his desire to get to the
office early, preceded by the
spirit of hatred. Hatred lived in
the rue Saint-Louis-Saint-Honore,
whereas love and devotion lived
far-off in the rue du Roi-Dore in the
Marais. This slight delay was
destined to affect Rabourdin's whole
career.
Sebastien opened his box eagerly,
found the memorandum and his own
unfinished copy all in order, and
locked them at once into the desk as
Rabourdin had directed. The mornings
are dark in these offices towards
the end of December, sometimes indeed
the lamps are lit till after ten
o'clock; consequently Sebastien did
not happen to notice the pressure
of the copying-machine upon the
paper. But when, about half-past nine
o'clock, Rabourdin looked at his
memorandum he saw at once the effects
of the copying process, and all the
more readily because he was then
considering whether these
autographic presses could not be made to do
the work of copying clerks.
"Did any one get to the office
before you?" he asked.
"Yes," replied Sebastien,--"Monsieur
Dutocq."
"Ah! well, he was punctual.
Send Antoine to me."
Too noble to distress Sebastien
uselessly by blaming him for a
misfortune now beyond remedy,
Rabourdin said no more. Antoine came.
Rabourdin asked if any clerk had
remained at the office after four
o'clock the previous evening. The
man replied that Monsieur Dutocq had
worked there later than Monsieur de
la Roche, who was usually the last
to leave. Rabourdin dismissed him
with a nod, and resumed the thread
of his reflections.
"Twice I have prevented his
dismissal," he said to himself, "and this
is my reward."
This morning was to Rabourdin like
the solemn hour in which great
commanders decide upon a battle and
weigh all chances. Knowing the
spirit of official life better than
any one, he well knew that it
would never pardon, any more than a
school or the galleys or the army
pardon, what looked like espionage
or tale-bearing. A man capable of
informing against his comrades is
disgraced, dishonored, despised; the
ministers in such a case would disavow
their own agents. Nothing was
left to an official so placed but to
send in his resignation and leave
Paris; his honor is permanently
stained; explanations are of no avail;
no one will either ask for them or
listen to them. A minister may well
do the same thing and be thought a
great man, able to choose the right
instruments; but a mere subordinate
will be judged as a spy, no matter
what may be his motives. While
justly measuring the folly of such
judgment, Rabourdin knew that it was
all-powerful; and he knew, too,
that he was crushed. More surprised
than overwhelmed, he now sought
for the best course to follow under
the circumstances; and with such
thoughts in his mind he was
necessarily aloof from the excitement
caused in the division by the death
of Monsieur de la Billardiere; in
fact he did not hear of it until
young La Briere, who was able to
appreciate his sterling value, came
to tell him. About ten o'clock, in
the bureau Baudoyer, Bixiou was
relating the last moments of the life
of the director to Minard, Desroys,
Monsieur Godard, whom he had
called from his private office, and
Dutocq, who had rushed in with
private motives of his own.
Colleville and Chazelle were absent.
Bixiou [standing with his back to
the stove and holding up the sole of
each boot alternately to dry at the
open door]. "This morning, at half-
past seven, I went to inquire after
our most worthy and respectable
director, knight of the order of
Christ, et caetera, et caetera. Yes,
gentlemen, last night he was a being
with twenty et caeteras, to-day
he is nothing, not even a government
clerk. I asked all particulars of
his nurse. She told me that this
morning at five o'clock he became
uneasy about the royal family. He
asked for the names of all the
clerks who had called to inquire
after him; and then he said: 'Fill my
snuff-box, give me the newspaper,
bring my spectacles, and change my
ribbon of the Legion of honor,--it
is very dirty.' I suppose you know
he always wore his orders in bed. He
was fully conscious, retained his
senses and all his usual ideas. But,
presto! ten minutes later the
water rose, rose, rose and flooded
his chest; he knew he was dying for
he felt the cysts break. At that
fatal moment he gave evident proof of
his powerful mind and vast
intellect. Ah, we never rightly appreciated
him! We used to laugh at him and
call him a booby--didn't you,
Monsieur Godard?"
Godard. "I? I always rated
Monsieur de la Billardiere's talents higher
than the rest of you."
Bixiou. "You and he could
understand each other!"
Godard. "He wasn't a bad man;
he never harmed any one."
Bixiou. "To do harm you must do
something, and he never did anything.
If it wasn't you who said he was a
dolt, it must have been Minard."
Minard [shrugging his shoulders].
"I!"
Bixiou. "Well, then it was you,
Dutocq!" [Dutocq made a vehement
gesture of denial.] "Oh! very
good, then it was nobody. Every one in
this office knew his intellect was
herculean. Well, you were right. He
ended, as I have said, like the
great man that he was."
Desroys [impatiently]. "Pray
what did he do that was so great? he had
the weakness to confess
himself."
Bixiou. "Yes, monsieur, he
received the holy sacraments. But do you
know what he did in order to receive
them? He put on his uniform as
gentleman-in-ordinary of the Bedchamber,
with all his orders, and had
himself powdered; they tied his
queue (that poor queue!) with a fresh
ribbon. Now I say that none but a
man of remarkable character would
have his queue tied with a fresh
ribbon just as he was dying. There
are eight of us here, and I don't
believe one among us is capable of
such an act. But that's not all; he
said,--for you know all celebrated
men make a dying speech; he
said,--stop now, what did he say? Ah! he
said, 'I must attire myself to meet
the King of Heaven,--I, who have
so often dressed in my best for
audience with the kings of earth.'
That's how Monsieur de la
Billardiere departed this life. He took upon
himself to justify the saying of
Pythagoras, 'No man is known until he
dies.'"
Colleville [rushing in]. "Gentlemen,
great news!"
All. "We know it."
Colleville. "I defy you to know
it! I have been hunting for it ever
since the accession of His Majesty
to the thrones of France and of
Navarre. Last night I succeeded! but
with what labor! Madame
Colleville asked me what was the
matter."
Dutocq. "Do you think we have
time to bother ourselves with your
intolerable anagrams when the worthy
Monsieur de la Billardiere has
just expired?"
Colleville. "That's Bixiou's
nonsense! I have just come from Monsieur
de la Billardiere's; he is still
living, though they expect him to die
soon." [Godard, indignant at
the hoax, goes off grumbling.]
"Gentlemen! you would never
guess what extraordinary events are
revealed by the anagram of this
sacramental sentence" [he pulls out a
piece of paper and reads], "Charles dix, par la
grace de Dieu, roi de
France et de Navarre."
Godard [re-entering]. "Tell
what it is at once, and don't keep people
waiting."
Colleville [triumphantly unfolding
the rest of the paper]. "Listen!
"A
H. V. il cedera;
De S. C. l. d. partira;
Eh
nauf errera,
Decide
a Gorix.
"Every letter is there!"
[He repeats it.] "A Henry cinq cedera (his
crown of course); de Saint-Cloud
partira; en nauf (that's an old
French word for skiff, vessel,
felucca, corvette, anything you like)
errera--"
Dutocq. "What a tissue of
absurdities! How can the King cede his crown
to Henry V., who, according to your
nonsense, must be his grandson,
when Monseigneur le Dauphin is
living. Are you prophesying the
Dauphin's death?"
Bixiou. "What's Gorix,
pray?--the name of a cat?"
Colleville [provoked]. "It is
the archaeological and lapidarial
abbreviation of the name of a town,
my good friend; I looked it out in
Malte-Brun: Goritz, in Latin
Gorixia, situated in Bohemia or Hungary,
or it may be Austria--"
Bixiou. "Tyrol, the Basque
provinces, or South America. Why don't you
set it all to music and play it on
the clarionet?"
Godard [shrugging his shoulders and
departing]. "What utter nonsense!"
Colleville. "Nonsense! nonsense
indeed! It is a pity you don't take
the trouble to study fatalism, the
religion of the Emperor Napoleon."
Godard [irritated at Colleville's
tone]. "Monsieur Colleville, let me
tell you that Bonaparte may perhaps
be styled Emperor by historians,
but it is extremely out of place to
refer to him as such in a
government office."
Bixiou [laughing]. "Get an
anagram out of that, my dear fellow."
Colleville [angrily]. "Let me
tell you that if Napoleon Bonaparte had
studied the letters of his name on
the 14th of April, 1814, he might
perhaps be Emperor still."
Bixiou. "How do you make that
out?"
Colleville [solemnly].
"Napoleon Bonaparte.--No, appear not at Elba!"
Dutocq. "You'll lose your place
for talking such nonsense."
Colleville. "If my place is
taken from me, Francois Keller will make
it hot for your minister."
[Dead silence.] "I'd have you to know,
Master Dutocq, that all known
anagrams have actually come to pass.
Look here,--you, yourself,--don't
you marry, for there's 'coqu' in
your name."
Bixiou [interrupting]. "And d,
t, for de-testable."
Dutocq [without seeming angry].
"I don't care, as long as it is only
in my name. Why don't you
anagrammatize, or whatever you call it,
'Xavier Rabourdin, chef du bureau'?"
Colleville. "Bless you, so I have!"
Bixiou [mending his pen]. "And
what did you make of it?"
Colleville. "It comes out as
follows: D'abord reva bureaux, E-u,--(you
catch the meaning? et eut--and had)
E-u fin riche; which signifies
that after first belonging to the
administration, he gave it up and
got rich elsewhere." [Repeats.]
"D'abord reva bureaux, E-u fin riche."
Dutocq. "That IS queer!"
Bixiou. "Try Isidore
Baudoyer."
Colleville [mysteriously]. "I
sha'n't tell the other anagrams to any
one but Thuillier."
Bixiou. "I'll bet you a
breakfast that I can tell that one myself."
Colleville. "And I'll pay if
you find it out."
Bixiou. "Then I shall breakfast
at your expense; but you won't be
angry, will you? Two such geniuses
as you and I need never conflict.
'Isidore Baudoyer' anagrams into
'Ris d'aboyeur d'oie.'"
Colleville [petrified with
amazement]. "You stole it from me!"
Bixiou [with dignity].
"Monsieur Colleville, do me the honor to
believe that I am rich enough in
absurdity not to steal my neighbor's
nonsense."
Baudoyer [entering with a bundle of
papers in his hand]. "Gentlemen, I
request you to shout a little
louder; you bring this office into such
high repute with the administration.
My worthy coadjutor, Monsieur
Clergeot, did me the honor just now to
come and ask a question, and he
heard the noise you are making"
[passes into Monsieur Godard's room].
Bixiou [in a low voice]. "The
watch-dog is very tame this morning;
there'll be a change of weather
before night."
Dutocq [whispering to Bixiou].
"I have something I want to say to
you."
Bixiou [fingering Dutocq's
waistcoat]. "You've a pretty waistcoat,
that cost you nothing; is that what
you want to say?"
Dutocq. "Nothing, indeed! I
never paid so dear for anything in my
life. That stuff cost six francs a
yard in the best shop in the rue de
la Paix,--a fine dead stuff, the
very thing for deep mourning."
Bixiou. "You know about
engravings and such things, my dear fellow,
but you are totally ignorant of the
laws of etiquette. Well, no man
can be a universal genius! Silk is
positively not admissible in deep
mourning. Don't you see I am wearing
woollen? Monsieur Rabourdin,
Monsieur Baudoyer, and the minister
are all in woollen; so is the
faubourg Saint-Germain. There's no
one here but Minard who doesn't
wear woollen; he's afraid of being
taken for a sheep. That's the
reason why he didn't put on mourning
for Louis XVIII."
[During this conversation Baudoyer
is sitting by the fire in Godard's
room, and the two are conversing in
a low voice.]
Baudoyer. "Yes, the worthy man
is dying. The two ministers are both
with him. My father-in-law has been
notified of the event. If you want
to do me a signal service you will
take a cab and go and let Madame
Baudoyer know what is happening; for
Monsieur Saillard can't leave his
desk, nor I my office. Put yourself
at my wife's orders; do whatever
she wishes. She has, I believe, some
ideas of her own, and wants to
take certain steps
simultaneously." [The two functionaries go out
together.]
Godard. "Monsieur Bixiou, I am
obliged to leave the office for the
rest of the day. You will take my
place."
Baudoyer [to Bixiou, benignly].
"Consult me, if there is any
necessity."
Bixiou. "This time, La
Billardiere is really dead."
Dutocq [in Bixiou's ear]. "Come
outside a minute." [The two go into
the corridor and gaze at each other
like birds of ill-omen.]
Dutocq [whispering]. "Listen.
Now is the time for us to understand
each other and push our way. What
would you say to your being made
head of the bureau, and I under
you?"
Bixiou [shrugging his shoulders].
"Come, come, don't talk nonsense!"
Dutocq. "If Baudoyer gets La
Billardiere's place Rabourdin won't stay
on where he is. Between ourselves,
Baudoyer is so incapable that if du
Bruel and you don't help him he will
certainly be dismissed in a
couple of months. If I know
arithmetic that will give three empty
places for us to fill--"
Bixiou. "Three places right
under our noses, which will certainly be
given to some bloated favorite, some
spy, some pious fraud,--to
Colleville perhaps, whose wife has
ended where all pretty women end--
in piety."
Dutocq. "No, to YOU, my dear
fellow, if you will only, for once in
your life, use your wits
logically." [He stopped as if to study the
effect of his adverb in Bixiou's face.]
"Come, let us play fair."
Bixiou [stolidly]. "Let me see
your game."
Dutocq. "I don't wish to be
anything more than under-head-clerk. I
know myself perfectly well, and I
know I haven't the ability, like
you, to be head of a bureau. Du Bruel
can be director, and you the
head of this bureau; he will leave
you his place as soon as he has
made his pile; and as for me, I
shall swim with the tide comfortably,
under your protection, till I can
retire on a pension."
Bixiou. "Sly dog! but how to
you expect to carry out a plan which
means forcing the minister's hand
and ejecting a man of talent?
Between ourselves, Rabourdin is the
only man capable of taking charge
of the division, and I might say of
the ministry. Do you know that
they talk of putting in over his
head that solid lump of foolishness,
that cube of idiocy, Baudoyer?"
Dutocq [consequentially]. "My
dear fellow, I am in a position to rouse
the whole division against
Rabourdin. You know how devoted Fleury is
to him? Well, I can make Fleury
despise him."
Bixiou. "Despised by
Fleury!"
Dutocq. "Not a soul will stand
by Rabourdin; the clerks will go in a
body and complain of him to the
minister,--not only in our division,
but in all the divisions--"
Bixiou. "Forward, march!
infantry, cavalry, artillery, and marines of
the guard! You rave, my good fellow!
And I, what part am I to take in
the business?"
Dutocq. "You are to make a
cutting caricature,--sharp enough to kill a
man."
Bixiou. "How much will you pay
for it?"
Dutocq. "A hundred francs."
Bixiou [to himself]. "Then
there is something in it."
Dutocq [continuing]. "You must
represent Rabourdin dressed as a
butcher (make it a good likeness),
find analogies between a kitchen
and a bureau, put a skewer in his
hand, draw portraits of the
principal clerks and stick their
heads on fowls, put them in a
monstrous coop labelled 'Civil
Service executions'; make him cutting
the throat of one, and supposed to
take the others in turn. You can
have geese and ducks with heads like
ours,--you understand! Baudoyer,
for instance, he'll make an
excellent turkey-buzzard."
Bixiou. "Ris d'aboyeur
d'oie!" [He has watched Dutocq carefully for
some time.] "Did you think of
that yourself?"
Dutocq. "Yes, I myself."
Bixiou [to himself]. "Do evil
feelings bring men to the same result as
talents?" [Aloud] "Well,
I'll do it" [Dutocq makes a motion of
delight] "--when" [full
stop] "--I know where I am and what I can rely
on. If you don't succeed I shall
lose my place, and I must make a
living. You are a curious kind of
innocent still, my dear colleague."
Dutocq. "Well, you needn't make
the lithograph till success is
proved."
Bixiou. "Why don't you come out
and tell me the whole truth?"
Dutocq. "I must first see how
the land lays in the bureau; we will
talk about it later" [goes
off].
Bixiou [alone in the corridor].
"That fish, for he's more a fish than
a bird, that Dutocq has a good idea
in his head--I'm sure I don't know
where he stole it. If Baudoyer
should succeed La Billardiere it would
be fun, more than fun--profit!"
[Returns to the office.] "Gentlemen, I
announce glorious changes; papa La
Billardiere is dead, really dead,--
no nonsense, word of honor! Godard
is off on business for our
excellent chief Baudoyer, successor
presumptive to the deceased."
[Minard, Desroys, and Colleville
raise their heads in amazement; they
all lay down their pens, and
Colleville blows his nose.] "Every one of
us is to be promoted! Colleville
will be under-head-clerk at the very
least. Minard may have my place as
chief clerk--why not? he is quite
as dull as I am. Hey, Minard, if you
should get twenty-five hundred
francs a-year your little wife would
be uncommonly pleased, and you
could buy yourself a pair of boots
now and then."
Colleville. "But you don't get
twenty-five hundred francs."
Bixiou. "Monsieur Dutocq gets
that in Rabourdin's office; why
shouldn't I get it this year?
Monsieur Baudoyer gets it."
Colleville. "Only through the
influence of Monsieur Saillard. No other
chief clerk gets that in any of the
divisions."
Paulmier. "Bah! Hasn't Monsieur
Cochin three thousand? He succeeded
Monsieur Vavasseur, who served ten
years under the Empire at four
thousand. His salary was dropped to
three when the King first
returned; then to two thousand five hundred
before Vavasseur died. But
Monsieur Cochin, who succeeded him,
had influence enough to get the
salary put back to three
thousand."
Colleville. "Monsieur Cochin
signs E. A. L. Cochin (he is named Emile-
Adolphe-Lucian), which, when
anagrammed, gives Cochineal. Now observe,
he's a partner in a druggist's
business in the rue des Lombards, the
Maison Matifat, which made its
fortune by that identical colonial
product."
Baudoyer [entering]. "Monsieur
Chazelle, I see, is not here; you will
be good enough to say I asked for
him, gentlemen."
Bixiou [who had hastily stuck a hat
on Chazelle's chair when he heard
Baudoyer's step]. "Excuse me,
Monsieur, but Chazelle has gone to the
Rabourdins' to make an
inquiry."
Chazelle [entering with his hat on
his head, and not seeing Baudoyer].
"La Billardiere is done for,
gentlemen! Rabourdin is head of the
division and Master of petitions; he
hasn't stolen HIS promotion,
that's very certain."
Baudoyer [to Chazelle]. "You
found that appointment in your second
hat, I presume" [points to the
hat on the chair]. "This is the third
time within a month that you have
come after nine o'clock. If you
continue the practice you will get
on--elsewhere." [To Bixiou, who is
reading the newspaper.] "My dear
Monsieur Bixiou, do pray leave the
newspapers to these gentlemen who
are going to breakfast, and come
into my office for your orders for
the day. I don't know what Monsieur
Rabourdin wants with Gabriel; he
keeps him to do his private errands,
I believe. I've rung three times and
can't get him." [Baudoyer and
Bixiou retire into the private
office.]
Chazelle. "Damned
unlucky!"
Paulmier [delighted to annoy
Chazelle]. "Why didn't you look about
when you came into the room? You
might have seen the elephant, and the
hat too; they are big enough to be
visible."
Chazelle [dismally].
"Disgusting business! I don't see why we should
be treated like slaves because the
government gives us four francs and
sixty-five centimes a day."
Fleury [entering]. "Down with Baudoyer!
hurrah for Rabourdin!--that's
the cry in the division."
Chazelle [getting more and more
angry]. "Baudoyer can turn off me if
he likes, I sha'n't care. In Paris
there are a thousand ways of
earning five francs a day; why, I
could earn that at the Palais de
Justice, copying briefs for the
lawyers."
Paulmier [still prodding him].
"It is very easy to say that; but a
government place is a government
place, and that plucky Colleville,
who works like a galley-slave
outside of this office, and who could
earn, if he lost his appointment,
more than his salary, prefers to
keep his place. Who the devil is
fool enough to give up his
expectations?"
Chazelle [continuing his philippic].
"You may not be, but I am! We
have no chances at all. Time was when
nothing was more encouraging
than a civil-service career. So many
men were in the army that there
were not enough for the government
work; the maimed and the halt and
the sick ones, like Paulmier, and
the near-sighted ones, all had their
chance of a rapid promotion. But
now, ever since the Chamber invented
what they called special training,
and the rules and regulations for
civil-service examiners, we are
worse off than common soldiers. The
poorest places are at the mercy of a
thousand mischances because we
are now ruled by a thousand
sovereigns."
Bixiou [returning]. "Are you
crazy, Chazelle? Where do you find a
thousand sovereigns?--not in your
pocket, are they?"
Chazelle. "Count them up. There
are four hundred over there at the end
of the pont de la Concorde (so
called because it leads to the scene of
perpetual discord between the Right
and Left of the Chamber); three
hundred more at the end of the rue
de Tournon. The court, which ought
to count for the other three
hundred, has seven hundred parts less
power to get a man appointed to a
place under government than the
Emperor Napoleon had."
Fleury. "All of which signifies
that in a country where there are
three powers you may bet a thousand
to one that a government clerk who
has no influence but his own merits
to advance him will remain in
obscurity."
Bixiou [looking alternately at
Chazelle and Fleury]. "My sons, you
have yet to learn that in these days
the worst state of life is the
state of belonging to the
State."
Fleury. "Because it has a constitutional
government."
Colleville. "Gentlemen,
gentlemen! no politics!"
Bixiou. "Fleury is right.
Serving the State in these days is no longer
serving a prince who knew how to
punish and reward. The State now is
EVERYBODY. Everybody of course cares
for nobody. Serve everybody, and
you serve nobody. Nobody is
interested in nobody; the government clerk
lives between two negations. The
world has neither pity nor respect,
neither heart nor head; everybody
forgets to-morrow the service of
yesterday. Now each one of you may
be, like Monsieur Baudoyer, an
administrative genius, a
Chateaubriand of reports, a Bossouet of
circulars, the Canalis of memorials,
the gifted son of diplomatic
despatches; but I tell you there is
a fatal law which interferes with
all administrative genius,--I mean
the law of promotion by average.
This average is based on the
statistics of promotion and the
statistics of mortality combined. It
is very certain that on entering
whichever section of the Civil
Service you please at the age of
eighteen, you can't get eighteen
hundred francs a year till you reach
the age of thirty. Now there's no
free and independent career in
which, in the course of twelve
years, a young man who has gone through
the grammar-school, been vaccinated,
is exempt from military service,
and possesses all his faculties (I
don't mean transcendent ones) can't
amass a capital of forty-five
thousand francs in centimes, which
represents a permanent income equal
to our salaries, which are, after
all, precarious. In twelve years a
grocer can earn enough to give him
ten thousand francs a year; a
painter can daub a mile of canvas and be
decorated with the Legion of honor,
or pose as a neglected genius. A
literary man becomes professor of
something or other, or a journalist
at a hundred francs for a thousand
lines; he writes "feuilletons," or
he gets into Saint-Pelagie for a
brilliant article that offends the
Jesuits,--which of course is an
immense benefit to him and makes him a
politician at once. Even a lazy man,
who does nothing but make debts,
has time to marry a widow who pays
them; a priest finds time to become
a bishop "in partibus." A
sober, intelligent young fellow, who begins
with a small capital as a
money-changer, soon buys a share in a
broker's business; and, to go even
lower, a petty clerk becomes a
notary, a rag-picker lays by two or
three thousand francs a year, and
the poorest workmen often become
manufacturers; whereas, in the
rotatory movement of this present
civilization, which mistakes
perpetual division and redivision
for progress, an unhappy civil
service clerk, like Chazelle for
instance, is forced to dine for
twenty-two sous a meal, struggles
with his tailor and bootmaker, gets
into debt, and is an absolute
nothing; worse than that, he becomes an
idiot! Come, gentlemen, now's the
time to make a stand! Let us all
give in our resignations! Fleury,
Chazelle, fling yourselves into
other employments and become the
great men you really are."
Chazelle [calmed down by Bixiou's
allocution]. "No, I thank you"
[general laughter].
Bixiou. "You are wrong; in your
situation I should try to get ahead of
the general-secretary."
Chazelle [uneasily]. "What has
he to do with me?"
Bixiou. "You'll find out; do
you suppose Baudoyer will overlook what
happened just now?"
Fleury. "Another piece of
Bixiou's spite! You've a queer fellow to
deal with in there. Now, Monsieur
Rabourdin,--there's a man for you!
He put work on my table to-day that
you couldn't get through within
this office in three days; well, he
expects me to have it done by four
o'clock to-day. But he is not always
at my heels to hinder me from
talking to my friends."
Baudoyer [appearing at the door].
"Gentlemen, you will admit that if
you have the legal right to find
fault with the chamber and the
administration you must at least do
so elsewhere than in this office."
[To Fleury.] "What are you
doing here, monsieur?"
Fleury [insolently]. "I came to
tell these gentlemen that there was to
be a general turn-out. Du Bruel is
sent for to the ministry, and
Dutocq also. Everybody is asking who
will be appointed."
Baudoyer [retiring]. "It is not
your affair, sir; go back to your own
office, and do not disturb
mine."
Fleury [in the doorway]. "It
would be a shameful injustice if
Rabourdin lost the place; I swear
I'd leave the service. Did you find
that anagram, papa Colleville?"
Colleville. "Yes, here it
is."
Fleury [leaning over Colleville's
desk]. "Capital! famous! This is
just what will happen if the
administration continues to play the
hypocrite." [He makes a sign to
the clerks that Baudoyer is
listening.] "If the government
would frankly state its intentions
without concealments of any kind,
the liberals would know what they
had to deal with. An administration
which sets its best friends
against itself, such men as those of
the 'Debats,' Chateaubriand, and
Royer-Collard, is only to be
pitied!"
Colleville [after consulting his
colleagues]. "Come, Fleury, you're a
good fellow, but don't talk politics
here; you don't know what harm
you may do us."
Fleury [dryly]. "Well, adieu,
gentlemen; I have my work to do by four
o'clock."
While this idle talk had been going
on, des Lupeaulx was closeted in
his office with du Bruel, where, a
little later, Dutocq joined them.
Des Lupeaulx had heard from his
valet of La Billardiere's death, and
wishing to please the two ministers,
he wanted an obituary article to
appear in the evening papers.
"Good morning, my dear du
Bruel," said the semi-minister to the head-
clerk as he entered, and not
inviting him to sit down. "You have heard
the news? La Billardiere is dead.
The ministers were both present when
he received the last sacraments. The
worthy man strongly recommended
Rabourdin, saying he should die with
less regret if he could know that
his successor were the man who had
so constantly done his work. Death
is a torture which makes a man
confess everything. The minister agreed
the more readily because his
intention and that of the Council was to
reward Monsieur Rabourdin's numerous
services. In fact, the Council of
State needs his experience. They say
that young La Billardiere is to
leave the division of his father and
go to the Commission of Seals;
that's just the same as if the King
had made him a present of a
hundred thousand francs,--the place
can always be sold. But I know the
news will delight your division,
which will thus get rid of him. Du
Bruel, we must get ten or a dozen
lines about the worthy late director
into the papers; his Excellency will
glance them over,--he reads the
papers. Do you know the particulars
of old La Billardiere's life?"
Du Bruel made a sign in the
negative.
"No?" continued des
Lupeaulx. "Well then; he was mixed up in the
affairs of La Vendee, and he was one
of the confidants of the late
King. Like Monsieur le Comte de
Fontaine he always refused to hold
communication with the First Consul.
He was a bit of a 'chouan'; born
in Brittany of a parliamentary
family, and ennobled by Louis XVIII.
How old was he? never mind about
that; just say his loyalty was
untarnished, his religion
enlightened,--the poor old fellow hated
churches and never set foot in one,
but you had better make him out a
'pious vassal.' Bring in,
gracefully, that he sang the song of Simeon
at the accession of Charles X. The
Comte d'Artois thought very highly
of La Billardiere, for he
co-operated in the unfortunate affair of
Quiberon and took the whole
responsibility on himself. You know about
that, don't you? La Billardiere
defended the King in a printed
pamphlet in reply to an impudent
history of the Revolution written by
a journalist; you can allude to his
loyalty and devotion. But be very
careful what you say; weigh your
words, so that the other newspapers
can't laugh at us; and bring me the
article when you've written it.
Were you at Rabourdin's yesterday?"
"Yes, monseigneur," said
du Bruel, "Ah! beg pardon."
"No harm done," answered
des Lupeaulx, laughing.
"Madame Rabourdin looked
delightfully handsome," added du Bruel.
"There are not two women like
her in Paris. Some are as clever as she,
but there's not one so gracefully
witty. Many women may even be
handsomer, but it would be hard to
find one with such variety of
beauty. Madame Rabourdin is far
superior to Madame Colleville," said
the vaudevillist, remembering des
Lupeaulx's former affair. "Flavie
owes what she is to the men about
her, whereas Madame Rabourdin is all
things in herself. It is wonderful
too what she knows; you can't tell
secrets in Latin before HER. If I
had such a wife, I know I should
succeed in everything."
"You have more mind than an
author ought to have," returned des
Lupeaulx, with a conceited air. Then
he turned round and perceived
Dutocq. "Ah, good-morning,
Dutocq," he said. "I sent for you to lend
me your Charlet--if you have the
whole complete. Madame la comtesse
knows nothing of Charlet."
Du Bruel retired.
"Why do you come in without
being summoned?" said des Lupeaulx,
harshly, when he and Dutocq were
left alone. "Is the State in danger
that you must come here at ten
o'clock in the morning, just as I am
going to breakfast with his
Excellency?"
"Perhaps it is, monsieur,"
said Dutocq, dryly. "If I had had the honor
to see you earlier, you would
probably have not been so willing to
support Monsieur Rabourdin, after
reading his opinion of you."
Dutocq opened his coat, took a paper
from the left-hand breast-pocket
and laid it on des Lupeaulx's desk,
pointing to a marked passage. Then
he went to the door and slipped the
bolt, fearing interruption. While
he was thus employed, the
secretary-general read the opening sentence
of the article, which was as
follows:
"Monsieur des Lupeaulx. A
government degrades itself by openly
employing such a man, whose real
vocation is for police diplomacy.
He is fitted to deal with the
political filibusters of other
cabinets, and it would be a pity
therefore to employ him on our
internal detective police. He is
above a common spy, for he is
able to understand a plan; he could
skilfully carry through a dark
piece of work and cover his retreat
safely."
Des Lupeaulx was succinctly analyzed
in five or six such paragraphs,--
the essence, in fact, of the
biographical portrait which we gave at
the beginning of this history. As he
read the words the secretary felt
that a man stronger than himself sat
in judgment on him; and he at
once resolved to examine the
memorandum, which evidently reached far
and high, without allowing Dutocq to
know his secret thoughts. He
therefore showed a calm, grave face
when the spy returned to him. Des
Lupeaulx, like lawyers, magistrates,
diplomatists, and all whose work
obliges them to pry into the human
heart, was past being surprised at
anything. Hardened in treachery and
in all the tricks and wiles of
hatred, he could take a stab in the
back and not let his face tell of
it.
"How did you get hold of this
paper?"
Dutocq related his good luck; des
Lupeaulx's face as he listened
expressed no approbation; and the
spy ended in terror an account which
began triumphantly.
"Dutocq, you have put your
finger between the bark and the tree," said
the secretary, coldly. "If you
don't want to make powerful enemies I
advise you to keep this paper a
profound secret; it is a work of the
utmost importance and already well
known to me."
So saying, des Lupeaulx dismissed
Dutocq by one of those glances that
are more expressive than words.
"Ha! that scoundrel of a
Rabourdin has put his finger in this!"
thought Dutocq, alarmed on finding
himself anticipated; "he has
reached the ear of the
administration, while I am left out in the
cold. I shouldn't have thought
it!"
To all his other motives of aversion
to Rabourdin he now added the
jealousy of one man to another man
of the same calling,--a most
powerful ingredient in hatred.
When des Lupeaulx was left alone, he
dropped into a strange
meditation. What power was it of
which Rabourdin was the instrument?
Should he, des Lupeaulx, use this
singular document to destroy him, or
should he keep it as a weapon to
succeed with the wife? The mystery
that lay behind this paper was all
darkness to des Lupeaulx, who read
with something akin to terror page
after page, in which the men of his
acquaintance were judged with
unerring wisdom. He admired Rabourdin,
though stabbed to his vitals by what
he said of him. The breakfast-
hour suddenly cut short his
meditation.
"His Excellency is waiting for
you to come down," announced the
minister's footman.
The minister always breakfasted with
his wife and children and des
Lupeaulx, without the presence of
servants. The morning meal affords
the only moment of privacy which
public men can snatch from the
current of overwhelming business.
Yet in spite of the precautions they
take to keep this hour for private
intimacies and affections, a good
many great and little people manage
to infringe upon it. Business
itself will, as at this moment,
thrust itself in the way of their
scanty comfort.
"I thought Rabourdin was a man
above all ordinary petty manoeuvres,"
began the minister; "and yet
here, not ten minutes after La
Billardiere's death, he sends me
this note by La Briere,--it is like a
stage missive. Look," said his
Excellency, giving des Lupeaulx a paper
which he was twirling in his
fingers.
Too noble in mind to think for a
moment of the shameful meaning La
Billardiere's death might lend to his
letter, Rabourdin had not
withdrawn it from La Briere's hands
after the news reached him. Des
Lupeaulx read as follows:--
"Monseigneur,--If twenty-three
years of irreproachable services
may claim a favor, I entreat your
Excellency to grant me an
audience this very day. My honor is
involved in the matter of
which I desire to speak."
"Poor man!" said des
Lupeaulx, in a tone of compassion which confirmed
the minister in his error. "We
are alone; I advise you to see him now.
You have a meeting of the Council
when the Chamber rises; moreover,
your Excellency has to reply to-day
to the opposition; this is really
the only hour when you can receive
him."
Des Lupeaulx rose, called the
servant, said a few words, and returned
to his seat. "I have told them
to bring him in at dessert," he said.
Like all other ministers under the
Restoration, this particular
minister was a man without youth.
The charter granted by Louis XVIII.
had the defect of tying the hands of
the kings by compelling them to
deliver the destinies of the nation
into the control of the middle-
aged men of the Chamber and the
septuagenarians of the peerage; it
robbed them of the right to lay
hands on a man of statesmanlike talent
wherever they could find him, no
matter how young he was or how
poverty-stricken his condition might
be. Napoleon alone was able to
employ young men as he chose,
without being restrained by any
consideration. After the overthrow
of that mighty will, vigor deserted
power. Now the period when
effeminacy succeeds to vigor presents a
contrast that is far more dangerous
in France than in other countries.
As a general thing, ministers who
were old before they entered office
have proved second or third rate,
while those who were taken young
have been an honor to European monarchies
and to the republics whose
affairs they have directed. The
world still rings with the struggle
between Pitt and Napoleon, two men
who conducted the politics of their
respective countries at an age when
Henri de Navarre, Richelieu,
Mazarin, Colbert, Louvois, the
Prince of Orange, the Guises,
Machiavelli, in short, all the best
known of our great men, coming
from the ranks or born to a throne,
began to rule the State. The
Convention--that model of
energy--was made up in a great measure of
young heads; no sovereign can ever
forget that it was able to put
fourteen armies into the field
against Europe. Its policy, fatal in
the eyes of those who cling to what
is called absolute power, was
nevertheless dictated by strictly
monarchical principles, and it
behaved itself like any of the great
kings.
After ten or a dozen years of
parliamentary struggle, having studied
the science of politics until he was
worn down by it, this particular
minister had come to be enthroned by
his party, who considered him in
the light of their business man.
Happily for him he was now nearer
sixty than fifty years of age; had
he retained even a vestige of
juvenile vigor he would quickly have
quenched it. But, accustomed to
back and fill, retreat and return to
the charge, he was able to endure
being struck at, turn and turn
about, by his own party, by the
opposition, by the court, by the
clergy, because to all such attacks
he opposed the inert force of a
substance which was equally soft and
consistent; thus he reaped the
benefits of what was really his
misfortune. Harassed by a thousand
questions of government, his mind,
like that of an old lawyer who has
tried every species of case, no
longer possessed the spring which
solitary minds are able to retain,
nor that power of prompt decision
which distinguishes men who are
early accustomed to action, and
young soldiers. How could it be
otherwise? He had practised
sophistries and quibbled instead of
judging; he had criticised effects
and done nothing for causes; his
head was full of plans such as a
political party lays upon the
shoulders of a leader,--matters of
private interest brought to an
orator supposed to have a future, a
jumble of schemes and impractical
requests. Far from coming fresh to
his work, he was wearied out with
marching and counter-marching, and
when he finally reached the much
desired height of his present
position, he found himself in a thicket
of thorny bushes with a thousand
conflicting wills to conciliate. If
the statesmen of the Restoration had
been allowed to follow out their
own ideas, their capacity would
doubtless have been criticised; but
though their wills were often
forced, their age saved them from
attempting the resistance which
youth opposes to intrigues, both high
and low,--intrigues which vanquished
Richelieu, and to which, in a
lower sphere, Rabourdin was to
succumb.
After the rough and tumble of their
first struggles in political life
these men, less old than aged, have
to endure the additional wear and
tear of a ministry. Thus it is that
their eyes begin to weaken just as
they need to have the
clear-sightedness of eagles; their mind is weary
when its youth and fire need to be
redoubled. The minister in whom
Rabourdin sought to confide was in
the habit of listening to men of
undoubted superiority as they
explained ingenious theories of
government, applicable or
inapplicable to the affairs of France. Such
men, by whom the difficulties of
national policy were never
apprehended, were in the habit of attacking
this minister personally
whenever a parliamentary battle or a
contest with the secret follies
of the court took place,--on the eve
of a struggle with the popular
mind, or on the morrow of a
diplomatic discussion which divided the
Council into three separate parties.
Caught in such a predicament, a
statesman naturally keeps a yawn
ready for the first sentence designed
to show him how the public service
could be better managed. At such
periods not a dinner took place
among bold schemers or financial and
political lobbyists where the
opinions of the Bourse and the Bank, the
secrets of diplomacy, and the policy
necessitated by the state of
affairs in Europe were not canvassed
and discussed. The minister has
his own private councillors in des
Lupeaulx and his secretary, who
collected and pondered all opinions
and discussions for the purpose of
analyzing and controlling the
various interests proclaimed and
supported by so many clever men. In
fact, his misfortune was that of
most other ministers who have passed
the prime of life; he trimmed and
shuffled under all his
difficulties,--with journalism, which at this
period it was thought advisable to
repress in an underhand way rather
than fight openly; with financial as
well as labor questions; with the
clergy as well as with that other
question of the public lands; with
liberalism as with the Chamber.
After manoeuvering his way to power in
the course of seven years, the
minister believed that he could manage
all questions of administration in
the same way. It is so natural to
think we can maintain a position by
the same methods which served us
to reach it that no one ventured to
blame a system invented by
mediocrity to please minds of its
own calibre. The Restoration, like
the Polish revolution, proved to
nations as to princes the true value
of a Man, and what will happen if
that necessary man is wanting. The
last and the greatest weakness of
the public men of the Restoration
was their honesty, in a struggle in
which their adversaries employed
the resources of political
dishonesty, lies, and calumnies, and let
loose upon them, by all subversive
means, the clamor of the
unintelligent masses, able only to
understand revolt.
Rabourdin told himself all these
things. But he had made up his mind
to win or lose, like a man weary of
gambling who allows himself a last
stake; ill-luck had given him as
adversary in the game a sharper like
des Lupeaulx. With all his sagacity,
Rabourdin was better versed in
matters of administration than in
parliamentary optics, and he was far
indeed from imagining how his
confidence would be received; he little
thought that the great work that
filled his mind would seem to the
minister nothing more than a theory,
and that a man who held the
position of a statesman would confound
his reform with the schemes of
political and self-interested
talkers.
As the minister rose from table,
thinking of Francois Keller, his wife
detained him with the offer of a
bunch of grapes, and at that moment
Rabourdin was announced. Des
Lupeaulx had counted on the minister's
preoccupation and his desire to get
away; seeing him for the moment
occupied with his wife, the
general-secretary went forward to meet
Rabourdin; whom he petrified with
his first words, said in a low tone
of voice:--
"His Excellency and I know what
the subject is that occupies your
mind; you have nothing to
fear"; then, raising his voice, he added,
"neither from Dutocq nor from
any one else."
"Don't feel uneasy,
Rabourdin," said his Excellency, kindly, but
making a movement to get away.
Rabourdin came forward respectfully,
and the minister could not evade
him.
"Will your Excellency permit me
to see you for a moment in private?"
he said, with a mysterious glance.
The minister looked at the clock and
went towards the window, whither
the poor man followed him.
"When may I have the honor of
submitting the matter of which I spoke
to your Excellency? I desire to
fully explain the plan of
administration to which the paper
that was taken belongs--"
"Plan of administration!"
exclaimed the minister, frowning, and
hurriedly interrupting him. "If
you have anything of that kind to
communicate you must wait for the
regular day when we do business
together. I ought to be at the
Council now; and I have an answer to
make to the Chamber on that point
which the opposition raised before
the session ended yesterday. Your
day is Wednesday next; I could not
work yesterday, for I had other
things to attend to; political matters
are apt to interfere with purely
administrative ones."
"I place my honor with all
confidence in your Excellency's hands,"
said Rabourdin gravely, "and I
entreat you to remember that you have
not allowed me time to give you an
immediate explanation of the stolen
paper--"
"Don't be uneasy," said des
Lupeaulx, interposing between the minister
and Rabourdin, whom he thus
interrupted; "in another week you will
probably be appointed--"
The minister smiled as he thought of
des Lupeaulx's enthusiasm for
Madame Rabourdin, and he glanced
knowingly at his wife. Rabourdin saw
the look, and tried to imagine its
meaning; his attention was diverted
for a moment, and his Excellency
took advantage of the fact to make
his escape.
"We will talk of all this, you
and I," said des Lupeaulx, with whom
Rabourdin, much to his surprise, now
found himself alone. "Don't be
angry with Dutocq; I'll answer for
his discretion."
"Madame Rabourdin is
charming," said the minister's wife, wishing to
say the civil thing to the head of a
bureau.
The children all gazed at Rabourdin
with curiosity. The poor man had
come there expecting some serious,
even solemn, result, and he was
like a great fish caught in the
threads of a flimsy net; he struggled
with himself.
"Madame la comtesse is very
good," he said.
"Shall I not have the pleasure
of seeing Madame here some Wednesday?"
said the countess. "Pray bring
her; it will give me pleasure."
"Madame Rabourdin herself
receives on Wednesdays," interrupted des
Lupeaulx, who knew the empty
civility of an invitation to the official
Wednesdays; "but since you are
so kind as to wish for her, you will
soon give one of your private
parties, and--"
The countess rose with some
irritation.
"You are the master of my
ceremonies," she said to des Lupeaulx,--
ambiguous words, by which she expressed
the annoyance she felt with
the secretary for presuming to
interfere with her private parties, to
which she admitted only a select
few. She left the room without bowing
to Rabourdin, who remained alone
with des Lupeaulx; the latter was
twisting in his fingers the
confidential letter to the minister which
Rabourdin had intrusted to La
Briere. Rabourdin recognized it.
"You have never really known
me," said des Lupeaulx. "Friday evening
we will come to a full
understanding. Just now I must go and receive
callers; his Excellency saddles me
with that burden when he has other
matters to attend to. But I repeat,
Rabourdin, don't worry yourself;
you have nothing to fear."
Rabourdin walked slowly through the
corridors, amazed and confounded
by this singular turn of events. He
had expected Dutocq to denounce
him, and found he had not been
mistaken; des Lupeaulx had certainly
seen the document which judged him
so severely, and yet des Lupeaulx
was fawning on his judge! It was all
incomprehensible. Men of upright
minds are often at a loss to
understand complicated intrigues, and
Rabourdin was lost in a maze of
conjecture without being able to
discover the object of the game
which the secretary was playing.
"Either he has not read the
part about himself, or he loves my wife."
Such were the two thoughts to which
his mind arrived as he crossed the
courtyard; for the glance he had
intercepted the night before between
des Lupeaulx and Celestine came back
to his memory like a flash of
lightning.
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