THE SISTERS' LAMENT FOR THEIR ABBESS

Now my mind was becoming unnerved in two ways, from the sight that met my gaze, and the sad wailing of the virgins that sounded in my ears. So far they had remained [986D] quiet and suppressed their grief, restraining ^[59] their impulse to mourn for fear of her, as if they dreaded her rebuke even when her voice was silent, lest in any way a sound should break forth from them contrary to her command and their mistress be grieved in consequence. But when they could no longer subdue their anguish in silence, and grief like some inward fire was smouldering in their hearts, all at once a bitter and irrepressible cry broke out; so that my reason no longer remained calm, but a flood of emotion, like a watercourse in spate, swept it away, and so, neglecting my duties, I gave myself up to lamentation. Indeed, the cause for the maidens' weeping seemed to me just and [988A] reasonable. For they were not bewailing the loss of human companionship and guidance, nor any other such thing as men grieve over when disaster comes. But it seemed as if they had been torn away from their hope in God and the salvation of their souls, and so they cried and bewailed in this manner----

"The light of our eyes has gone out, 
The light that guided our souls has been taken away. ^[60] 
The safety of our life is destroyed, 
The seal of immortality is removed, 
The bond of restraint has been taken away,
The support of the weak has been broken, 
The healing of the sick removed. 
In thy presence the night became to us as day,
Illumined with pure life, 
But now even our day will be turned to gloom."

Saddest of all in their grief were those who [988B] called on her as mother and nurse. These were they whom she picked up, exposed by the roadside in the time of famine. She had nursed and reared them, and led them to the pure and stainless life.

But when, as it were from the sleep, I recovered my thoughts, I looked towards that holy face and it seemed as if it rebuked me for the confusion of the noisy mourners. So I called to the sisters with a loud voice----

"Look at her, and remember her commands, by which she trained you to be orderly and decent in everything. One occasion for ^[61] tears did this divine soul ordain for us, recommending us to weep at the time of prayer. Which now we may do, by turning the lamentations into psalmody in the same strain."