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| Mimoza Ahmeti The secret of my youth IntraText - Concordances (Hapax - words occurring once) |
Poem
1 1| consideration, or whether she acquired it as a result of her big 2 1| in the essence of their activity other than to constitute 3 1| serious, respectable and admired individuals - had found 4 1| its nature. Yes, and those all-possessing eyes could do nothing in 5 1| full. She loved it.~ I allowed my happiness to be jeopardized, 6 1| impression they made on me.~ Anger began to take form within 7 | any 8 1| were making fun of me. And anyway, what significance could 9 1| have still not learned to appreciate when it is bestowed upon 10 | are 11 1| them that bliss could be attained. It was a strange game played 12 1| everything normal or average is attracted, in contradiction to its 13 1| could fill her eyes. I had attributed this rarity to my virtue. 14 1| which everything normal or average is attracted, in contradiction 15 1| them. Every time I try to avoid something, it homes in on 16 1| possibly imagine.~ I had avoided those eyes for a long time. 17 | away 18 1| name:~ "Hey, Eyes! Come back, Eyes!"~ But it was in 19 | became 20 | before 21 1| they made on me.~ Anger began to take form within my breast. 22 | begin 23 | beginning 24 1| this decision before ever being seen by them. And indeed, 25 1| was one of the rare human beings (though I doubt very much 26 1| revived as I stood there benumbed from what I had done. No, 27 | beside 28 1| to appreciate when it is bestowed upon us. A weakness? Perhaps. 29 | beyond 30 1| reflection of a tree or a bird in the spring. But then, 31 1| she was given the name at birth, the time at which our parents 32 1| eyes she often filled with blue sky or with dreams of the 33 1| stuck in my throat like a bone.~ She gave no reply. 34 1| unusual of reflections: the boon of happiness.~ I could 35 | both 36 1| began to take form within my breast. It looked as if she were 37 1| how hard it was for me to call her by her name:~ "Hey, 38 1| a sacrifice. Perhaps it came about since, though I was 39 | can 40 1| that I was alone in this capacity) to fill almost all the 41 1| her big eyes. Whatever the case may be, it is true that 42 1| the same two eyes I had caught a glance of at the start - 43 1| conviction that I had been the cause of the withering and shrinking 44 1| or a face for example - a certain space in her eyes remained 45 1| mutilated in her eyes.~ No, I certainly did not want to see myself 46 1| she observed something - a city, a flower or a face for 47 1| unreal. But I got very close and I know what it is, even 48 1| had illuminated the dark clouds of my doubts, a flash which 49 1| her name:~ "Hey, Eyes! Come back, Eyes!"~ But it 50 1| people, for instance, had complained that they had seen themselves 51 1| precise, many people were confused by them.~ They were the 52 1| without taking our wishes into consideration, or whether she acquired 53 1| not realize that she was constantly reducing the size of her 54 1| their activity other than to constitute an ‘anomaly.’ They offered 55 1| average is attracted, in contradiction to its nature. Yes, and 56 1| lethal to my hardly profound conviction that I had been the cause 57 1| totally.~ I am presently convinced that everything beautiful 58 1| regarded it as a matter of course. And for her, it was one. 59 1| lying, you’re lying," I cried out. "You have ugly eyes, 60 1| Text~She had a rather curious name. They called her Eyes. 61 1| by wearing out, indeed by damaging her eyes. Bliss is the only 62 1| lightning had illuminated the dark clouds of my doubts, a flash 63 1| disturbed me somehow.~ The days passed. Her eyes became 64 1| become devoid of all beauty. Deceptive eyes. That is the impression 65 1| She gave no reply. She departed with eyes revived as I stood 66 1| regained the place that I deserved in them. Soon thereafter 67 1| Now there is nothing I desire more than to be captured 68 1| I was almost ‘the one’ destined for her eyes. I was not 69 1| Even worse. They had become devoid of all beauty. Deceptive 70 1| sometimes underwent a perilous disfigurement. Quite normal people, for 71 1| thereafter my happiness dissipated. I had been almost complete, 72 1| muscle under the skin which disturbed me somehow.~ The days 73 1| eyes became more and more disturbing for me, not in their beauty, 74 1| Yes, I realize there is a dose of illusion in most human 75 1| rare human beings (though I doubt very much that I was alone 76 1| illuminated the dark clouds of my doubts, a flash which proved lethal 77 | down 78 1| filled with blue sky or with dreams of the future. Such was 79 1| reflected in her eyes as a drop of water. Other people - 80 | either 81 | else 82 1| space in her eyes remained empty. The objects she observed 83 1| existence is so short and ephemeral. Because the reflection 84 1| could do nothing in the essence of their activity other 85 1| grew faint. Finally one evening I seized her by the shoulders 86 | Every 87 1| a flower or a face for example - a certain space in her 88 1| beautiful on earth is an exception, an ‘anomaly’ of sorts, 89 1| and infinite whereas human existence is so short and ephemeral. 90 1| were not always like that. Experience has made them the way they 91 1| I now do, how rare, how extremely rare people were who could 92 1| a city, a flower or a face for example - a certain 93 1| the more their glance grew faint. Finally one evening I seized 94 1| length. For me they had fallen into a morass of normality. 95 1| But because of it, I still feel human in my suffering. I 96 1| long time. I could not help feeling a shudder down my spine 97 1| their glance grew faint. Finally one evening I seized her 98 | first 99 1| observed something - a city, a flower or a face for example - 100 1| the corner of her eye, a fold in the muscle under the 101 1| Anger began to take form within my breast. It looked 102 | found 103 1| when... they were still free of me. I don’t know why, 104 1| looked as if she were making fun of me. And anyway, what 105 1| meeting of physical beauty and functional perfection. When I praised 106 1| sky or with dreams of the future. Such was her life.~ 107 1| throat like a bone.~ She gave no reply. She departed with 108 1| did not always fill her gaze. It could very well happen 109 1| beginning to understand why she gazed so long at the sky. It filled 110 1| time at which our parents give us names without taking 111 1| both young and old, would gossip about at length. For me 112 1| impossible, unreal. But I got very close and I know what 113 1| themselves not reflected, but grotesquely mutilated in her eyes.~ 114 1| given up all hope of my growing, that I spotted the wrinkle 115 1| which proved lethal to my hardly profound conviction that 116 | has 117 1| vain. She did not return. Having turned her eyes away from 118 1| shudder down my spine when I heard someone whisper that her 119 1| a long time. I could not help feeling a shudder down my 120 | hers 121 1| call her by her name:~ "Hey, Eyes! Come back, Eyes!"~ 122 1| try to avoid something, it homes in on me. Now there is nothing 123 1| when she had given up all hope of my growing, that I spotted 124 | however 125 1| a flash of lightning had illuminated the dark clouds of my doubts, 126 1| realize there is a dose of illusion in most human reflections. 127 1| normal people could possibly imagine.~ I had avoided those 128 1| painful reflection of our own impotence). I want to attain the impossible. 129 1| Deceptive eyes. That is the impression they made on me.~ Anger 130 1| respectable and admired individuals - had found themselves not 131 1| a process is so long and infinite whereas human existence 132 1| Quite normal people, for instance, had complained that they 133 1| of reproach turned into insult. I could not understand 134 1| interrupted.~ She had no intention of returning. There was 135 1| eyes and her brain was now interrupted.~ She had no intention 136 | its 137 1| bright, penetrating and pure, just as they had been when I 138 1| sense of perception much keener than what normal people 139 1| perhaps for this reason that knowledge as a process is so long 140 1| incomplete persons she had known up to then. I was almost ‘ 141 1| possession of bliss! Let them laugh at me all they want (laughing 142 1| laugh at me all they want (laughing at someone else is often 143 1| thing that we have still not learned to appreciate when it is 144 | least 145 1| old, would gossip about at length. For me they had fallen 146 1| doubts, a flash which proved lethal to my hardly profound conviction 147 1| For one moment, a flash of lightning had illuminated the dark 148 1| youth. One more reason for living 149 1| form within my breast. It looked as if she were making fun 150 1| understand, and I thought a lot about it later, why a girl 151 1| It looked as if she were making fun of me. And anyway, what 152 | many 153 1| They were the most marvellous eyes I have ever seen in 154 1| though I did not succeed in mastering it. I believe that I can 155 1| Perhaps she regarded it as a matter of course. And for her, 156 1| eyes. Whatever the case may be, it is true that those 157 1| a reflection, and by no means the most unusual of reflections: 158 1| seen in my whole life, the meeting of physical beauty and functional 159 1| told me, if only she had mentioned the problem, I would have 160 1| I was overwhelmed by the metamorphosis in her eyes. For one moment, 161 | might 162 1| metamorphosis in her eyes. For one moment, a flash of lightning had 163 1| myself transformed into a monster in the eyes of a girl.~ 164 1| me they had fallen into a morass of normality. Even worse. 165 1| of her eye, a fold in the muscle under the skin which disturbed 166 1| reflected, but grotesquely mutilated in her eyes.~ No, I certainly 167 1| which our parents give us names without taking our wishes 168 1| in contradiction to its nature. Yes, and those all-possessing 169 1| fallen into a morass of normality. Even worse. They had become 170 1| her eyes for my sake. I noticed nothing to begin with. Perhaps 171 1| very well happen that any object, however big it might seem, 172 1| eyes remained empty. The objects she observed did not always 173 1| constitute an ‘anomaly.’ They offered a precise reflection. Yes, 174 1| which people, both young and old, would gossip about at length. 175 1| shouted, her eyes slowly opened. To my surprise, they grew 176 | others 177 1| done. In reality, I was overwhelmed by the metamorphosis in 178 | own 179 1| often nothing more than a painful reflection of our own impotence). 180 1| birth, the time at which our parents give us names without taking 181 1| never spoken to me of the particular quality of her glance. Perhaps 182 1| me somehow.~ The days passed. Her eyes became more and 183 1| they grew big and bright, penetrating and pure, just as they had 184 1| eyes of hers had a sense of perception much keener than what normal 185 1| physical beauty and functional perfection. When I praised her eyes, 186 1| eyes sometimes underwent a perilous disfigurement. Quite normal 187 1| filled to the full with the person reflected in them, only 188 1| complete of all the incomplete persons she had known up to then. 189 1| whole life, the meeting of physical beauty and functional perfection. 190 1| from me, I regained the place that I deserved in them. 191 1| it though. I want to take possession of bliss! Let them laugh 192 1| functional perfection. When I praised her eyes, that is, when 193 1| this time totally.~ I am presently convinced that everything 194 1| only she had mentioned the problem, I would have done battle 195 1| reason that knowledge as a process is so long and infinite 196 1| proved lethal to my hardly profound conviction that I had been 197 1| my doubts, a flash which proved lethal to my hardly profound 198 1| bright, penetrating and pure, just as they had been when 199 1| to me of the particular quality of her glance. Perhaps she 200 1| terrible? It was simply a question of a little tiny something 201 1| perilous disfigurement. Quite normal people, for instance, 202 1| shoulders and shook her in rage:~ "You’re lying, you’ 203 1| eyes. I had attributed this rarity to my virtue. How ridiculous! 204 | rather 205 1| bliss would have been beyond reach. It is only when her eyes 206 1| from what I had done. In reality, I was overwhelmed by the 207 1| always left over beside my refection. If only she had told me, 208 1| her eyes away from me, I regained the place that I deserved 209 1| her glance. Perhaps she regarded it as a matter of course. 210 1| certain space in her eyes remained empty. The objects she observed 211 1| told her I loved her, she replied simply, "My eyes were not 212 1| a bone.~ She gave no reply. She departed with eyes 213 1| without her eyes? My words of reproach turned into insult. I could 214 1| with me.~ The more I reproached her, the more patience she 215 1| Whatever should happen, I was resolved not to let myself be captured 216 1| Other people - serious, respectable and admired individuals - 217 1| whether she acquired it as a result of her big eyes. Whatever 218 1| was in vain. She did not return. Having turned her eyes 219 1| She had no intention of returning. There was to be no more 220 1| She departed with eyes revived as I stood there benumbed 221 1| size of her eyes solely to rid herself of that little hole 222 1| rarity to my virtue. How ridiculous! She seemed to realize this 223 1| made me believe that I was right. I did not realize, as I 224 1| corner of her eye, but it was room enough for a reflection, 225 1| should have made such a sacrifice. Perhaps it came about since, 226 1| everything.~ And so she sacrificed herself. I did not realize 227 1| size of her eyes for my sake. I noticed nothing to begin 228 1| as they had been when I saw them for the first time, 229 1| something more.~ Some people say that bliss is impossible, 230 1| total bliss.~ This is the secret of my youth. One more reason 231 1| certainly did not want to see myself transformed into 232 | seem 233 | seemed 234 1| faint. Finally one evening I seized her by the shoulders and 235 1| those eyes of hers had a sense of perception much keener 236 1| of water. Other people - serious, respectable and admired 237 | several 238 1| become sufficient. What a shame! I was insufficient, and 239 1| her by the shoulders and shook her in rage:~ "You’re 240 1| whereas human existence is so short and ephemeral. Because the 241 1| evening I seized her by the shoulders and shook her in rage:~ " 242 1| She was stupefied. As I shouted, her eyes slowly opened. 243 1| her, the more patience she showed, the more her eyes withered 244 1| cause of the withering and shrinking of her eyes, the most beautiful 245 1| could not help feeling a shudder down my spine when I heard 246 1| of me. And anyway, what significance could my love possibly have 247 1| in the muscle under the skin which disturbed me somehow.~ 248 1| As I shouted, her eyes slowly opened. To my surprise, 249 1| reducing the size of her eyes solely to rid herself of that little 250 | Some 251 | somehow 252 | sometimes 253 1| that I deserved in them. Soon thereafter my happiness 254 1| exception, an ‘anomaly’ of sorts, towards which everything 255 1| know why, but I was now speechless, with something stuck in 256 1| feeling a shudder down my spine when I heard someone whisper 257 1| they are." She had never spoken to me of the particular 258 1| hope of my growing, that I spotted the wrinkle in the corner 259 1| a tree or a bird in the spring. But then, total bliss would 260 1| with. Perhaps she had not started reducing their size at the 261 1| departed with eyes revived as I stood there benumbed from what 262 1| could be attained. It was a strange game played between her 263 1| speechless, with something stuck in my throat like a bone.~ 264 1| had enough!"~ She was stupefied. As I shouted, her eyes 265 1| is, even though I did not succeed in mastering it. I believe 266 1| human in my suffering. I suffer to become sufficient, to 267 1| I still feel human in my suffering. I suffer to become sufficient, 268 1| eyes slowly opened. To my surprise, they grew big and bright, 269 | taking 270 1| understand now? Is it not terrible? It was simply a question 271 1| Text~She had a rather curious 272 | thereafter 273 | therefore 274 1| eyes. Bliss is the only thing that we have still not learned 275 1| could not understand, and I thought a lot about it later, why 276 1| with something stuck in my throat like a bone.~ She gave 277 1| called her name several times over. You will never believe 278 1| two eyes, and this time totally.~ I am presently convinced 279 | towards 280 1| did not want to see myself transformed into a monster in the eyes 281 1| with the reflection of a tree or a bird in the spring. 282 1| Whatever the case may be, it is true that those eyes of hers 283 1| seen by them. Every time I try to avoid something, it homes 284 1| You have ugly eyes, the ugliest eyes I have ever seen. Leave 285 1| I cried out. "You have ugly eyes, the ugliest eyes I 286 | under 287 1| that her eyes sometimes underwent a perilous disfigurement. 288 1| that created a void, a tiny unfilled hole in the corner of her 289 1| would leave a void. This unoccupied space in her eyes she often 290 1| that bliss is impossible, unreal. But I got very close and 291 1| and by no means the most unusual of reflections: the boon 292 | upon 293 | used 294 1| Eyes!"~ But it was in vain. She did not return. Having 295 1| seen. Leave me alone! I’ve had enough!"~ She was 296 1| attributed this rarity to my virtue. How ridiculous! She seemed 297 1| the start since she was waiting for me to grow, to become ‘ 298 1| indeed so tiny that, had she wanted to, she could have filled 299 1| in her eyes as a drop of water. Other people - serious, 300 | we 301 1| it is bestowed upon us. A weakness? Perhaps. But because of 302 1| created it with hard work by wearing out, indeed by damaging 303 | well 304 | whereas 305 1| spine when I heard someone whisper that her eyes sometimes 306 | who 307 | whole 308 | will 309 1| names without taking our wishes into consideration, or whether 310 1| had been the cause of the withering and shrinking of her eyes, 311 | within 312 1| have without her eyes? My words of reproach turned into 313 1| had created it with hard work by wearing out, indeed by 314 1| morass of normality. Even worse. They had become devoid 315 1| growing, that I spotted the wrinkle in the corner of her eye, 316 1| more her eyes withered and wrinkled, and the more their glance 317 1| eyes which people, both young and old, would gossip about 318 1| This is the secret of my youth. One more reason for living